In this past year of transformation of my soul and my life, these words have never rang so true. I used to think that peace some how came through respect, accomplishments, money and the positive reinforcement of others...but I could have never been more wrong.
The high of an award only lasted for an hour. The amp of having 'money to blow' only ultimately left me on E. And broke. The praise of others only made me smile for a second, although I do think that smile was sincere. Forcing respect only made me feel ignorant in the end for letting another get to me.
I lacked
Because even though there were pretty pictures to show, I felt alone no matter what supposed 'elite' crowd I was with.
I know I'm not the only one. Maybe one of the few bold enough to admit it though.
Have you ever been in a room full of people and felt alone? Have you ever laughed your butt off, only to go home and sulk on your pillow? Have you ever repressed memories and turned up the volume so loud to songs because you didn't want to hear your thoughts? Have you ever felt incomplete, only seemingly put together to the world? Have you ever felt like you can't sit still?
Me too.
Then God.
It wasn't until I willingly let go of everything that I gained much more. I stopped depending on others and things to make or keep me happy...even if they were pretty good at it. It was all temporal pleasures. Deep in my soul there were scars that needed to be healed. The half way forgiveness, only leading me to live a bit selfish.
There's no peace greater than a relationship with God. And I aint talking about religion. But going to Him without appointments or the approval of ANYONE.
I pray that each and everyone of you know peace. It doesn't just happen over night and because life is REAL, it's an every day RENEWAL.
The high of an award only lasted for an hour. The amp of having 'money to blow' only ultimately left me on E. And broke. The praise of others only made me smile for a second, although I do think that smile was sincere. Forcing respect only made me feel ignorant in the end for letting another get to me.
I lacked
Because even though there were pretty pictures to show, I felt alone no matter what supposed 'elite' crowd I was with.
I know I'm not the only one. Maybe one of the few bold enough to admit it though.
Have you ever been in a room full of people and felt alone? Have you ever laughed your butt off, only to go home and sulk on your pillow? Have you ever repressed memories and turned up the volume so loud to songs because you didn't want to hear your thoughts? Have you ever felt incomplete, only seemingly put together to the world? Have you ever felt like you can't sit still?
Me too.
Then God.
It wasn't until I willingly let go of everything that I gained much more. I stopped depending on others and things to make or keep me happy...even if they were pretty good at it. It was all temporal pleasures. Deep in my soul there were scars that needed to be healed. The half way forgiveness, only leading me to live a bit selfish.
There's no peace greater than a relationship with God. And I aint talking about religion. But going to Him without appointments or the approval of ANYONE.
I pray that each and everyone of you know peace. It doesn't just happen over night and because life is REAL, it's an every day RENEWAL.
No God, No Peace. KNOW God, Know Peace. #letskeepitauthenticWith all my love,
1 comment:
Keep on keepin on, your headed down the right path bestie...Im almost there but a few more hurfles and ill be right next to you. God works in mysterious ways we never know why we are going through whatever it is that we are going through but better believe its for a reason, to maybe teach us that life isnt as hard as we make it seem:) Im so proud of you and even though your younger then me your filled with so much wisdom and power. God is dealing with you and most definitely dealing with me, sometimes we may get side tracked with feelings of affliction and loneliness but just always know you have the ultimate ruler on your side and with that nothing is wrong. I love you and I will continue to fight to live my life the way he expects and I know youll do the same. Love you and keep your head held high for like Joel Olsteen said we have royal blood floowin through our veins..<3
Post a Comment